323/365

Adam B.: I met you one night while I was bartending
and thought you were pretty cute so I bought you a shot...
it worked because you came back to my work later that night
and took me to the Frontier in your cool, old black cadillac
convertible. I think I liked you because you were not from NM
and you had a twangy accent, which I liked. You seemed nice
enough in the beginning, but then you started coming on really
strong and that was a MAJOR turn off. I mean, you'd come over
unannounced- SOMETHING I HATE ABOUT ANYONE- take your
shoes and socks off when you entered my apt., after stopping
by unannounced and you tried to be best friends with all my
friends. Then, when I told you things weren't going to work
out because I was (and still am VERY much) in love with someone
else, you tried becoming HIS friend. Even after I told you
this, you'd still stop by my work and call me and altogether
just creep me out. Then, finally, the last straw, you hooked
up with one of my friends and there was NO way I was ever going
to go out or even talk to you again. You ended up moving back
to NC, and the last I heard from you was in an email inquiring
about my relationship and I never replied. You were the first
and last person I'd ever been with that wasn't circumsized.

332/365

Rudy: You were my 1st boyfriend... in the 4th grade.
We liked eachother instantly and didn't actually kiss
until the 7th grade. We used to hold hands and that was
nervewracking enough! After middle school, I never saw
you again. You did call my sister one night about 4 years
ago... she didn't mind since you were just asking how I was.

346/365

Augustine: You were my 1st boyfriend in the 9th grade -
even though I didn't ever want to kiss-and you were
so funny! No one understood why I liked someone with
braces and glasses... but, you were nice. And you played
football. And even though I was a prude til I was 18, I
still liked to look at your body. After a whole 3 weeks
of "dating"- we never went anywhere- it was over. Then,
you kept sending me those dumb Balloon-o-grams... those
were embarrassing.

352/365

Chris C: We started off as friends. You'd come to
my house on Sunset and bring me food and fix things.
Then you had a dream we made out and a few weeks later,
we did. We went snowboarding a bunch of times and it was
fun. Then, your crazy ex wouldn't back off so we went our
separate ways. You did try though and so did I. The last
time I saw you was a few weeks ago when you were putting
out a fire on my street...I was walking the pug and turned
around when I saw you. I'd rather not talk to you these days...
too weird. You may feel the same.